Fart Jokes 17
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A pretty woman fell in love with a widowed man. He was very shy, so she finally asked him out for a date. He was to come to pick her up that Friday night at 6.
At 5:59 pm, as they made eye contact through the window while he walked up to the door, she had a sudden, uncontrollable urge to fart. “Ordering 3 egg salad sandwiches for lunch today was really bad idea,” she thought in a panic. But she didn't want to fart by the door, because she didn't want the man think she had a stinky house.
The fart was balled up in her intestines. It ached. She really had to fart, but she didn't know if she could let it out quietly on the way to the car. “Nothing's worse than a duck quack every step,” she thought, alarmed. She quickly developed a plan.
They walked to the car, chatted pleasantly, and he opened the door for her. As she sat down and he turned around to walk around the back of the car, she finally let loose and fart-fart-farted like crazy – an ear-splitting, bone rattling TRTRTRTRTRTRTRTR! Then came another - PHRRRT! Finally, two closing POOT's punctuated the volley. Totally relieved, she delayed in closing the door and waved her hands frantically to fan the foul air out. “Phew – close call,” she thought, until the man got in and indicated towards the back seat, “Oh, I hope you don't mind – I couldn't find a babysitter tonight. Kids, meet my new friend, Marlene.”
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