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Automated Switchboard Greeting at 1-800-DIA-RRHEA: “Hi, you're through to the Incontinence Hotline... Can you please hold?”

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Martin and Bob were standing in a locker room when one noticed that the other had a cork up his butt.

Bob: "How'd you get a cork in your butt?"

Martin: "I was walking along the beach and tripped over a lamp. There was a puff of smoke, then a big green Genie in a turban came puffing out. He said, 'I am Sharil, the Magic Genie of Syria. I will grant you one wish.' So I said, 'No sh*t.'”





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